Weekend Forecast: 10/12/07

Tom Wilkinson in Michael Clayton
“Do you see this finger? Do you know where it’s been?
Do you have any idea??? WELL, DO YOU??!!?”
Tom Wilkinson having a bad day in Michael Clayton (2007)

If it’s Thursday, this must be a Weekend Forecast. Here’s what’s opening wide this week:

  • Elizabeth: The Golden Age. I keep hearing this thing stinks. I try not to let critical opinion sway me, but after a while you have to begin to think: where there’s stink, there’s shit.
  • Michael Clayton. After opening in limited release last week, the new Clooney movie goes wide. Check it out. You won’t regret it.

  • Across the Universe. This one has been rolling out slowly for awhile and will expand to 954 theaters this weekend.
  • The Final Season. Directed by the guy who did the two Sandlot movies plus Beethoven 3 and 4. What else do you need to know exactly? Seriously, just go to the Clooney movie or The Darjeeling Limited or The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford. He didn’t even do 1 and 2 for crapsakes. It was 3 and 4. Did you even know there was a 3 or 4??
  • Tyler Perry’s Why Did I get Married? Tyler Perry, why don’t you shut the fuck up?
  • We Own the Night. I was kind of looking forward to this one, but I saw the TV commercial last night and the best they could come up with was a quote from Larry King. That can’t be good, can it? I mean, you could probably get a postive pull quote on ass cancer from Larry King. (in Larry King voice) “If you get just one kind of cancer this year, make it ass cancer. You’ll be glad you did. Murfreesboro, Tennessee, you’re on the air…” Anyway, it’s the one where Joaquin Phoenix runs a club that’s a hangout for the Russian mafia in New York in the 80s. Marky Mark is his cop brother and Robert Duvall is his cop dad. You can see where the shit might hit the fan, right? Right.

These movies have already opened and are making small expansions this weekend:

  • The Assassination of Jesse James by the Coward Robert Ford. Apparently Warner Bros. doesn’t want you to see this movie. It’s expanding into more theaters this weekend, but many local critics weren’t given a chance to screen it for a review in the local paper. Don’t be fooled! Check Moviefone.com, the oh-so-irritating Fandango.com, or the movie listing source of your choice.
  • The Darjeeling Limited. Expands into 90+ theaters this weekend so it should be playing in a major city near you.
  • Lust, Caution. Ditto with 77 theaters.

And the new limited releases:

  • Lars and the Real Girl. I was skeptical about this one at first, but I keep hearing great things about it. Ryan Gosling’s new girlfriend is a doll. I think it’s an actual sex doll. He pushes her around in a wheelchair. I’m sold.
  • Sleuth. Hmmm…Kenneth Branagh directs this remake with Michael Caine and Jude Law. Harold Pinter wrote the screenplay. Yeah, I don’t know.
  • Laaga Chunari Mein Daag – The Journey of a Woman. Bollywood drama about two sisters who find life in the big city a little more complicated than in their rural home.
  • Terror’s Advocate. Documentary from Barbet Schroeder (who has a small role in The Darjeeling Limited…now playing at a theater near you. Check it out) about Jacques Verges, the lawyer who has defended several terrorists and assorted evil folks over the years.
  • Summer ’04. Fans of Martina Gedeck from The Lives of Others might want to check this German film out. It’s a psychological thriller about a happy couple on vacation whose teenaged son shows up with a Lolita-like girlfriend. I’m getting a Swimming Pool vibe off of it.

And here’s what’s opening in NY only:

  • Control(10/10, opens in LA 10/19). Feature film about the Joy Division frontman is getting excellent reviews.
  • Khadak. Set in the frozen steppes of Mongolia where zzZzzZZzzzzz ZZzzZzZ ZZ ZzZZ zZZZzzzZZ ZZzZZZZZzZZzz
  • King Corn. Documentary about the American food distribution system centering on two east coast college friends who decide to buy an acre of land to grow corn and then track that corn as it makes its way through the food system. This is going to be another one of those Super Size Me deals that make me feel like shit about the junk I eat, I just know it. Yeah, well, just try and take away my corn syrup sweetened sodas and crunchy salty corn chips (aka Salsa Delivery Devices) assholes! I dare you!

25 thoughts on “Weekend Forecast: 10/12/07

  1. FINALLY! Finally I get to see some movies I’ve been waiting to see all year. Thank you. Darjeeling Limited and Assassination of Jesse James are must-sees. Elizabeth 2 and Michael Clayton are also on the list. I’m also curious about Control and Lars and the Real Girl. I saw a trailer for Lars and the Real Girl that was designed in the “indie feel good movie” mold but the whole concept of Lars rendered the trailer formula oddly inert. You just can’t get past the fact that he’s a dude shacked up with an anatomically correct blow-up doll. Something tells me this isn’t going to be just another Oscar contender.

  2. I’m getting that exact same vibe off of Lars. Precious indie quirk is getting old, but this seems like a different animal. We’ll see. Mainstream movies, maybe I’ll use Elizabeth an excuse to go to the multplex to get multiple-movie viewing on a single ticket if you know what I mean and I think you do. Sleuth will be one of those rare movies where I let reviews dictate whether I go.

  3. I’m checking out Clayton, and Night if that’s convenient this weekend. I liked Elizabeth when I saw it in the theatre nearly ten years ago, but I haven’t seen it since. Elizabeth 2’s “eh” reviews are making me lean toward a Netflix viewing as opposed to the theatre.

    Sleuth looks interesting to me, we’ll see. I haven’t seen the original.

    Well said on Tyler Perry.

  4. Based on the trailer, I didn’t think it was, but some reviews are referring to it as such.

    If it is a sex doll, I think it might be one of those hyper-realistic ones, not the blow-up kind with open mouths.

    Wait, am I coloring myself as some kind of sex doll expert?

  5. I believe the concept for Lars is based on the Real Doll thing. The web site is NSFW but if you search for Real Doll, you’ll get there. Wired had an amazing article last year on that whole subculture. All I know is that any amount of money is too much for a sex doll, but $3000 is insane.

  6. This isn’t the first relationship between a man and a doll that is presented with some degree of sympathy. There was also Dennis Hopper’s Feck and his rubber girlfriend in River’s Edge. I think “she” was a sex doll.

  7. I used to have a doll. Her name was Althea. My friends and I took her to Sweden House Smorgasbord (All U Can Eat!) and Roller Derby. We even gave her a baby shower, but she was kidnapped wearing the g-string and pasties that had been designed for the occasion. Fortunately she was returned but eventually ran away from home after a period of promiscuity — none too soon, as the Department of Social Services was on my case.

    I can’t wait for Lars and his Real Girl.

    And with a Harold Pinter screenplay, Sleuth may be more interesting than the original.

  8. What I think is interesting about Sleuth is that Pinter and Branagh took a movie that used to be 138 minutes and chopped it down to 86.

  9. So, the myriad facets of Msr. de Plume continue to reveal themselves… fascinating!

    Jeff, interesting in a good way or interesting in a bad way?

    My kneejerk reaction is almost always anti-remake, but in this case I don’t have a special fondness for the original and I’m curious about the talent involved.

  10. LOL Pierre!

    A girlfriend in College was working as a psych lab instructor. She told me of a clearly unwell young female student who took her doll (not a life sized one) to every lab and lecture. The woman believed the doll was doing College with her as a fellow student. Her lab instructors and classmates never challenged her beliefs, even to the extent that the doll would get its own course material. In the end, she disappeared (presumably under helpful circumstances) after she attracted the interest of a clinical psychology lecturer through complaining that he needed to speak up more loudly in lectures because the doll couldn’t hear him.

  11. I’ve always liked to think that while the student was being stabilized in a clinic somewhere the doll went on to graduate with honors. But then again, life is hard on little creatures.

  12. ‘go to the multplex to get multiple-movie viewing on a single ticket if you know what I mean and I think you do.’ no craig..i have no idea what you mean….. 😉

    joel…you haven’t lived until you’ve seen a guy have sex with a real doll until he orgasms. i love the internet !!!!!

    joel those vids are uh ..there. and you must at least one. dude, that is documnetary of the year type stuf… 😉

    and joel it’s almost as insane that used real dolls have popped up on ebay…..google *that*

    and craig if you can’t marry the female that had the doll. well, maybe you could just have sex with her. that would almost be as good yes ???

    you know what they say about the crazy ones…

    and gosh the a.d. front page legends pierre and sartre are here too !!!! *cool* 🙂

    and i’d rather see lars than atonement. guess my oscar buzz cred is none. ha ha… 🙂

  13. Glimmer has a point there, Craig. Maybe you should try that I’m-in-love-with-a -doll-who-I-think-is-a real-girl schicht. Of course you’ll have to comb your hair in a dorky way and wear slightly oversized and bland cloths. The chicks will be all over you.

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