Studio Pinhead #1: Say, that crazy Cronenberg character is big these days. How can we get ourselves a Cronenberg type picture without actually hiring Cronenberg?
Studio Pinhead #2: Yeah, he works cheap, but he kinda freaks me out. Canadians are supposed to be harmless, but I wouldn’t want to be alone with that guy. There’s something behind the eyes…
Development Weasel: Well, we’ve got this treatment here for a remake of The Brood, how about that?
Studio Pinhead #2: Which one is that? Is that the one where the girl grows a second vagina with the blood drinking penis that comes out of it? Or is it the one with the guy who snorts bug powder and talks to cockroaches and whatnot?
Development Weasel: No, I think this is the one with the evil midgets.
Studio Pinhead #1: Right. Midgets. I like it. I wonder if we could get them to work for half price. Tell Margaret to get whatsisname’s agent on the phone. You know. The little guy with the trains. Dinklage. Get Dinklage’s agent on the phone. Chop-chop.
Studio Pinhead #2: If we can’t get Dinklage, maybe that Webster kid is still working. Whatsisname? Gary Coleman?
Studio Pinhead #1: No, you mean Emanuel Lewis. Remind me to tell you the story some time about me, Emanuel Lewis, Gavin MacLeod, two hookers and a half kilo of blow. It’s a riot. You’ll love it. Listen, maybe we should forget about the midgets and go with monkeys with jet packs and laser rifles.
Studio Pinhead #2: Wait, what about the one with the exploding heads? Can we do that one?
Development Weasel: Scanners. Sorry, no. Someone already beat us to it.
Studio Pinhead #2: Damnit. The one that got away.
Variety reports on the remake of The Brood.